Episode Description:

What makes an apology feel sincere? Hint: it’s in your syllables. This week, Arielle and Karissa dig into the psychology of saying sorry, celebrate Boise’s bold geothermal energy system, and share other global solutions that are heating things up (in the best way).

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Transcript:

Theme music

Arielle:

Hello and welcome to The Optimist Daily’s Weekly Round-up. I’m Arielle.

Karissa:

And I’m Karissa, and we’re working hard to put solutions in view—and optimism in motion.

Arielle:

We’re back with another episode of our pod to share some of the solutions from Optimist Daily this week. How are you doing, Karissa?

Karissa:

There was a lot of wind this past week, which was making me a little sneezy.

Arielle:

Oh yeah? How are your allergies?

Karissa:

They’ve been… better-ish. They were gone, and now they’re back. Lots of dust flying around.

Arielle:

Yeah, I’ve actually been missing a bit of the rain lately.

Karissa:

Mhm.

Arielle:

Things aren’t as lush and green as they normally are, and without all that rain, everything just goes a bit yellow. So we’re looking forward to some showers this weekend, actually—that should be good.

Karissa:

Could be a cozy weekend for you then.

Arielle:

I’m going to the spa.

Karissa:

Yes, we love it. A great solution to take care of yourself.

Arielle:

Exactly. And I’ve been feeling a little stressed lately because I’m trying to learn about investing and taxes… and I don’t know if any of our listeners can relate, but I’m also kind of a multinational person—with residency in the Netherlands and my bank back in Canada and all of that fun stuff.

Karissa:

Yeah.

Arielle:

I know it’s not the most exciting topic, but I’m an optimist… and I just wish we learned more about investing, taxes, and financial literacy in school—when we had the time and resources to absorb it all.

Karissa:

I feel the same way. I’m not multinational like you—my finances are a little more in one country—but yeah, we don’t learn about this stuff in school at all. We just learn that if you put your money into a savings account, then you’ll get some interest… and that’s about it.

We shared an article a couple months ago about this one group called Female Invest, I believe?

Arielle:

Mmhm, yeah.

Karissa:

And they’re working to bridge that financial literacy gap between men and women.

Arielle:

Maybe our Optimist Daily team can look more into financial solutions…

Karissa:

Mhm.

Arielle:

…that’ll lift my spirits and inform me.

Karissa:

Exactly.

Arielle:

Did you have an “I’m an optimist but…” this week?

Karissa:

Well, I don’t really have something for the “I’m an optimist but…” segment today, but I am ready to hear your Solution of the Week, Arielle.

Arielle:

Alright, I’ll start with a quick question. When was the last time you apologized for something—and actually really thought about how you said it?

Karissa:

Last time I apologized?

Both:

(laugh)

Arielle:

Yeah.

Karissa:

Umm… maybe somewhat recently? I do try to think about how I say sorry—being in a long-distance relationship and all. I try to say it genuinely, choose my words carefully, and not just be like, “I’m sorry you felt that way,” you know?

Arielle:

Yeah, that’s the worst.

Karissa:

Right? You have to be actionable, like, “I’m sorry I did this.”

Arielle:

Yeah, maybe be specific.

Karissa:

Exactly. So… somewhat recently, I suppose.

Arielle:

Well, I won’t dig too much…

Karissa:

(laughs)

Arielle:

…but according to some new research, the words you choose when you say “I’m sorry” might actually change how sincere you sound. So you’re definitely on the right track if you’re thinking about these things while you’re apologizing.

And get this—this was kind of surprising to me when I read the article—using longer words, not necessarily weird or obscure ones, but slightly more complex (yet familiar) words, can make your apology feel more genuine.

Karissa:

Oh, that’s really interesting. So it’s not just about using fancier words to sound smarter than the person you’re in conflict with?

Arielle:

Exactly. We’re going to explore this idea more because it’s what the article I chose this week is all about. It’s titled, Sorry, not sorry? Science says sincerity is in your syllables.

Karissa:

Whoa, that alliteration is… (laughs) kind of wild.

Arielle:

Yeah, I know. Bit of a tongue-twister. (laughs)

Apparently, longer words take more effort to think through and say—and that effort signals to the other person that you’re really trying. It’s kind of a demonstration of emotional labor.

Karissa:

Yeah, that makes sense. It’s not just cheap talk.

Arielle:

Exactly. Even though people sometimes dismiss apologies as cheap talk—like you said—psychology, and now linguistics, suggest that people do care when someone puts in the effort to apologize.

Karissa:

And who’s behind all this research?

Arielle:

A psychologist named Dr. Shiri Lev-Ari, from Royal Holloway University of London. She looked at how the lengthand commonness of words in an apology can affect how sincere it sounds.

Karissa:

Okay, and how did she test that? Are we talking lab experiments or awkward real-life apologies?

Arielle:

A bit of both, actually. First, she analyzed apology tweets—from 25 celebrities and 25 regular users—and compared them with those people’s regular tweets.

Karissa:

Ooh, I think I know where this is going.

Arielle:

Turns out, apology tweets used longer words on average. But the words weren’t less common—so again, it’s not about being pretentious or using rare vocabulary. It’s just about putting in that little bit of extra effort.

Karissa:

Okay, but what about people actually reading or hearing the apologies? Do they find them more convincing?

Arielle:

Yeah, that was the next part. Lev-Ari ran an experiment where participants rated different versions of apologies. The wording varied in either length or word commonness. So for example:

“My action does not show who I am”

vs. “My action does not reflect my true self”

vs. “My action does not represent my true character.”

Karissa:

Ooh, okay. I feel like that last one—“does not represent my true character”—hits a little harder.

Arielle:

That’s exactly what participants thought too. Across the board, the longer-worded apologies were rated as more sincere. Interestingly though, whether the words were common or rare didn’t really change how sincere the apology felt.

Karissa:

So… it’s the syllables, not the status.

Arielle:

Perfectly put. The research suggests that people subconsciously pick up on the effort behind the language. But—and this is important—if the words are too obscure, that can actually backfire. You want to show you care, not confuse the person you’re apologizing to.

Karissa:

Mhm. So let’s say I mess up and want to say sorry in a way that lands—what’s the move?

Arielle:

Lev-Ari’s advice is pretty straightforward: slow down, choose slightly longer—but still accessible—words, and avoid the most basic phrases.

So instead of just, “I’m sorry,” maybe say, “I deeply regret what happened.”

Or instead of, “That was bad,” you could say, “That was inconsiderate of me.”

Karissa:

Yeah, it’s still really clear, but definitely more thoughtful. And I love this attention to the power of just one or two different words—how that can make it more impactful.

Arielle:

Yeah, the power of language. So again, the goal isn’t to sound fancy. It’s just to show that you’re putting thought into what you say, and that thoughtfulness is what helps bridge the gap between feeling regret and actually reconnecting with someone.

Karissa:

I love that, because communication isn’t just about the message, of course—it’s about the effort behind it. And we can definitely pick up on that.

Arielle:

Exactly. So the next time someone offers you an apology, maybe listen not just to the words, but to how much care they’ve put into them.

I just picked this one because I thought it was a fun language piece—and also probably pretty applicable to a lot of people’s lives.

Karissa:

Definitely.

Arielle:

I know I mess up sometimes. (laughs)

Karissa:

Yeah. We all do.

Arielle:

So it’s good to know how to apologize.

Karissa:

That actually reminds me of a video I saw just last night—it was ranking internet apologies. Like, the worst internet apologies from online celebrities.

Arielle:

Oh wow. I guess it’s kind of on trend right now.

Karissa:

I know! I have to go back and look at what they said that made people think the apologies were bad. It might have included the fake tears, you know?

Arielle:

Oh yeah, the over-dramatization…

Karissa:

Yes, exactly.

Arielle:

Well, that’s cool. I guess we can look at what not to do.

Karissa:

Yeah. When celebrities or influencers—or whoever—are in hot water, they might not always have the best apology.

But… being in hot water might not always be a bad thing. (laughs)

Arielle:

(laughs) I think I see what you’re doing. That’s a very nice segue into your solution. Did you want to go ahead and tell us about it?

Karissa:

Yes please! I’m very intrigued by this solution over in Boise, Idaho. I’ve spent a lot of time there myself—I have family in the area and some BFFs there too—so I’m familiar with a lot of the geography mentioned in this article.

The title of the solution is How Boise, Idaho is heating hundreds of buildings with clean geothermal energy. Home to hundreds of natural hot springs, Boise has tapped into the geothermal potential beneath its feet, creating the largest municipally operated geothermal heating system in the United States.

Today, nearly 500 buildings—including City Hall, which is a gorgeous building—university facilities, hospital campuses, and even the Idaho State House, are heated using naturally hot water drawn from underground aquifers.

Arielle:

500 is a really impressive number.

Karissa:

And it makes Idaho’s capital the only one in the country to run on geothermal energy. So, a pretty cool title to have.

The system also warms some sidewalks in winter to melt snow and contributes heat to local hot tubs—so a lot of cool things going on with geothermal energy.

Arielle:

Oh my gosh, heating sidewalks? As a Canadian, I think that’s amazing. (laughs)

Karissa:

Yeah! (laughs)

Arielle:

So how exactly does it all work? I know a bit about geothermal energy, but how does the environment of Boise allow for this particular model?

Karissa:

Well, thanks to local fault lines, Boise’s groundwater is heated by hot rocks deep underground—reaching temperatures of around 170°F, or 77°C. Wells in the nearby foothills bring the heated water into a closed-loop system. That water flows through pipes into buildings, transfers its heat, and is then returned to the aquifer to be reheated naturally.

In each building, the heat is transferred from the geothermal system to a separate enclosed pipe network that distributes warmth throughout the space.

Arielle:

Okay—yeah, that’s a whole process.

Karissa:

It really is!

Arielle:

How long has Boise been using this method?

Karissa:

This sustainable process has grown steadily over the past 40 years. City officials report that the number of buildings served has increased more than sixfold.

But interestingly, geothermal heating isn’t new to Boise at all. It actually dates back to the 1890s, when residents first drilled wells to access scalding hot aquifer water. That resource was used to heat swimming pools, homes, and even the lavish Victorian home of a local water company executive.

That early enthusiasm led to the creation of the Boise Warm Springs Water District. And it wasn’t until the oil crisis of the 1970s that the city revisited the idea on a broader scale—deciding to use what they already had below them.

Arielle:

Okay, so this type of energy isn’t new at all. It’s a great reminder that sometimes sticking to the basics can be just as effective as something new and innovative.

Karissa:

Exactly. Going back to the basics—and expanding this use—has led to some impressive numbers. In 2024 alone, the system reduced annual carbon dioxide emissions by 6,500 metric tons. That’s equivalent to taking 1,500 cars off the road.

Arielle:

Sounds like a great way to incorporate more clean and renewable energy into the city.

Karissa:

And today, Boise has four geothermal systems: one city-run utility, one operated by the Boise Warm Springs District, and two more serving the state capital and the U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs.

Arielle:

How exactly is this funded?

Karissa:

Well, the city system is funded by the sale of water—not taxes. So that’s pretty interesting. And while the cost is roughly comparable to natural gas, it becomes even more economical when used alongside heat pumps.

For older homes—particularly those large Victorian houses in the Warm Springs District—geothermal heating is a cost-effective solution. Because the system relies on minimal electricity, it also reduces stress on the grid.

While expansion is limited by what the aquifer can sustain, the district still plans to add about 30 more homes to meet growing demand.

Arielle:

I wonder if other places around the world with access to geothermal energy will consider expanding their usage too.

Karissa:

Yeah, Boise’s innovative use of geothermal energy hasn’t just improved local sustainability—it’s already attracted international interest. Visitors from Iceland, Croatia, and Australia have come to learn from Boise’s geothermal model.

Arielle:

Wow, that’s really cool. Hopefully it spreads.

Karissa:

Yeah, it’s definitely giving inspiration. And I know Optimist Daily wrote about a town in Germany tapping into their geothermal energy too.

Arielle:

Oh yeah—for heating homes in the winter, right?

Karissa:

Exactly. It’s very cool to see different regions of the world looking below them to heat homes instead of relying on natural gas.

Arielle:

Thank you so much for sharing that! I think we had a really nice mix of solutions today.

Karissa:

We definitely did—and we also had more that we shared, including…

Arielle:

Is No Mow May helping bees or just overgrown hype? Here’s what the experts say

Feeling checked out? Here’s how to recognize functional freeze and gently move forward

Solar panels to become standard on new homes in England by 2027 under net zero push

and

Is gardening the most underrated workout? The mind-body benefits of one hour in the garden.

What else do we have, Karissa?

Karissa:

We have Twice-daily pill offers hope for patients in England and Wales with advanced breast cancer,

Poland expands free health screenings to adults aged 20 and up,

Brontë country designated as one of England’s largest national nature reserves,

and

Want to boost your mental health? These free habits pack a serious punch.

Arielle:

If you’re interested in any of these solutions—and more—we highly recommend subscribing to our free daily newsletter. That way, you’ll get our solutions straight to your inbox and can start every day on a positive, optimistic foot.

Karissa:

And if you’d rather get your solutions from social media, we’re on just about everything! You can find us @OptimistDaily. Except on X—there, we’re @OdeToOptimism.

Arielle:

If you’d like to support us financially, you can click the link in the show notes to learn how. But we also know that sometimes money is tight, and not everyone can contribute financially.

So, another great way to support us is just to share Optimist Daily with your friends, your family, your loved ones—whether it’s the newsletter, the website, or just this podcast.

Karissa:

As always, it was great to be here with you today…

…and to share these great solutions.

Arielle:

Ditto! I hope you have an amazing weekend—and I’m gonna go ahead and jump into some hot water myself.

Both:

(laugh)

Karissa:

Yeah, enjoy that spa treatment!

Arielle:

All right, until next week. Bye!

Karissa:

Bye!