Bad energy can make its way into even the healthiest of relationships. If you feel like you’ve been butting heads with your partner rather than living harmoniously, here are a few powerful yet simple ways to remove the negative and move past these difficult moments.
Use the “praise sandwich”
Most of us feel more comfortable offering praise than criticism. Yet, regularly, it’s the praise that falls by the wayside while we shoot off quick criticisms or reminders throughout the day. Over time, all those seemingly innocuous comments add up and we start feeling unappreciated.
To offset this buildup of negative energy, try using a “praise sandwich.” This is where you sandwich a piece of constructive feedback between two compliments. This approach makes it easier for you to address something you’d like to see change and makes it more likely your partner will hear you openly without taking the criticism personally.
When you allow tension and resentments to build up too long, they can eventually lead to a serious conflict. Instead, try scheduling time to share thoughts or tough emotions you are withholding with your partner. When done regularly, this habit can drastically reduce the kind of day-to-day bickering that leads to larger and more dramatic conflicts.
Rather than succumbing to a moment’s outburst when you’re feeling angry, find a way to make it funny. Make an observation, reference an inside joke, or draw a parallel with something humorous you two experienced recently. This allows you to reframe your problems differently and can bring some fun back into your relationship.
In long-term relationships, we tend to take one another for granted, while we should be doing the exact opposite. Try adopting a practice of sharing three things you appreciate about your partner at the end of each day. Over time you will find that the things you once fought over daily seem less significant and your love for each other has become richer and stronger.